#BeTheSolution

Domestic violence is a very real and very scary way of life for many people. I won’t just say “women”, because men can also be victims of domestic violence. There has been quite a bit of attention in the media lately about this very subject, and it is time to take a stand.

The Blue Shield of California Foundation is bringing awareness about this very important issue and their hope is that through their #BeTheSolution campaign, we can hopefully bring an end to domestic violence, or at least spread awareness.

Blue Shield of California Foundation, one of the state’s largest philanthropies, is committed to combatting domestic violence through funding and public awareness. Its new #BeTheSolution campaign is spreading the message that domestic violence is everyone’s issue to tackle, all of the time—not just those who are actively experiencing or perpetrating it, and not just when an incident like the recent NFL scandal brings it to the public’s attention in a big way. Blue Shield of California Foundation believes that each of us can play a role in identifying, addressing, and stopping domestic violence in our personal lives and in our communities.

I really hope you have never dealt with domestic violence. It is horrible.  I witnessed domestic violence with a very good friend several years ago, and I tried desperately to help. I remember her telling me about one incident, where her boyfriend was drinking and got mad at her and hit her. She ran down the hallway to get away from him, but he followed her into their room and sat on top of her with his hands around her neck. She was terrified, naturally, but managed to get up and ran to the back door. The only problem was they locked the door from the inside with a key, and they key was normally kept on the refrigerator next to the door. When she reached up to grab the key to make her escape, it wasn’t there. She huddled in front of the door, unable to leave, and was very frightened.

It took a long time, and lots of tears before she finally got the courage up to leave her boyfriend.  Many times, people in an abusive relationship are either afraid to leave, or they believe the abuser when they apologize and promise it will never happen again. It is a vicious cycle.  Often the victim thinks they cannot leave, as they don’t have a means to support themselves and/or their children. My friend was able to move back in with her parents, and fortunately he didn’t follow her or come looking for her (which is the case many times). It just saddened me so much, and left me feeling helpless, because I tried to help so many times, but she wasn’t ready to end things.

The statistics on domestic violence are staggering:

I personally cannot think of a reason not to leave an abusive relationship, but I’m sure it is very difficult to do so. There are secret women’s shelters that will help abused women and their children, by offering food and shelter until permanent arrangements can be made.

Part of the goal of the #BeTheSolution campaign is to get men involved, and talking too. Everyone can and should get involved.  By doing so, hopefully it won’t be such an uncomfortable subject to discuss. I’m sure there are plenty of men who have a mother, sister, aunt, etc., who might be in an abusive relationship. Please speak up!

If you are are being abused, there IS help available. I hope you will utilize these helpful resources for victims of domestic violence, to end the vicious cycle. If you need counseling or support, please call 1-800-799-SAFE.

How can you help?

Please visit , and upload a photo with the hashtag #BeTheSolution. You can also post your photo on Twitter, Instagram or wherever else you’d like, to help spread awareness. Your photo doesn’t have to be anything fancy – in fact you can even take a picture with a handwritten sign with #BeTheSolution on it. This is such an easy way to help, and if you feel as strongly as I do about ending domestic violence, I hope you will help spread the word.

For your reference, feel free to visit:
Blue Shield of California Foundation, President’s message.
Blue Shield of California Foundation Against Domestic Violence grants (currently totaling $3,766,800!).

*Although I will be compensated for this sponsored campaign, all opinions and stories are my own.