A couple of days ago the hubs and I were talking about a conversation that I had with my twin sister during which she said “You are nothing like what I thought you’d be when we were growing up.” We both laughed and I admitted that I’m also surprised at how I turned out. And, apparently, so are a lot of other people. People who knew me in high school always have the same reaction when they find me on Facebook ~ “You mean you’re not in the middle of a jungle somewhere?” or “Wait! You’re a mom? What the heck happened to you?”
In high school I was that odd combination of brightly attired bookworm with a wallflower complex who wore the perfume of quiet desperation and teen angst like it was Chanel No. 5. In fact, I was so uncool that I was known by two names “Shontel’s Sister” and “The Other Twin”. But the one thing that everyone knew about The Other Twin was that I would somehow end up in the middle of nowhere saving people who didn’t know they needed saving.
All throughout high school, I had these plans of travelling the world and reporting on stories that mattered. I wanted to go to Madagascar and live among the natives. I dreamed of talking to the leaders of La Revolución (it didn’t matter what revolution, just as long as I was there). I imagined myself bonding with other journalists as we hunkered down with troops stationed in various war zones. This globe trotting life of which I dreamed was courtesy of Danielle Steel and her book, Message from Nam, about a young female reporter who sacrificed all to tell the story of the Vietnam War. This story was closely followed by M. M. Kaye’s Trade Wind which so vividly described Zanzibar that I felt a pull to visit all places exotic.
Books have always been a part of my life, they gave me the name for my oldest daughter ~ Anjuli from The Far Pavilions by M. M. Kaye. The stories that I read shaped me and molded me, they helped to become the creative, eccentric, ballsy, loud~mouthed woman that I am today. No, I don’t travel the world as a journalist but I do help students discover new places (both offline and online) as a librarian. I’m not helping to change history but I do get to discuss the way it has impacted the present as an history instructor. I’m not living with pygmies in the middle of a jungle but I’m always in danger of a coup as a wife and mom. So, no, my life didn’t turn out how I thought it would but it has turned out the way it should.
What about you? Is your life what you expected it to be when you were a teenager?
Ceinwyn
What a great post, and how much more this complex must have affected you being a twin! I think people are pretty shocked that I’m a wife and mother too. I was valedictorian of my high school class and got my AA degree in high school, so I think everyone, including myself expected me to at least get my Master’s degree and probably my PHD, always have loved school. Instead I finished my BA in English Education and paused for a bit. I’m fine with taking a break to have a family though, it gives me time to grow up a bit and develop. I can always get a degree later in life, but missing moments with my son, that’s irreplaceable.
Daenel T
Exactly. Being a twin people compared and contrasted us a lot. But, like you, I chose the path that kept me at home with my babies when they were young and is completely opposite of what everyone expected. I can honestly say, being home with them was the best unexpected decision I’ve ever made and I pray it will be the same for you.
Eileen
I guess I pretty much new I was gonna be a mom but not to SIX. I was not encouraged to go on to school even though my grades were good, was just expected to get married and settle down because I dated my first husband all through high school. So even my teachers expected that and did nothing to let me know that I COULD and SHOULD go to college. I wanted SO badly to go onto journalism school myself. Even after I escaped the “jungle” and ferocious BEAST that was my first husband, I did go on to school only to find it was going to take WAY to much time away from my family and the guilt almost killed me. I did go on to school, but went with a different path. I didnt really surprise anyone . I did shock the h outta others when I got the balls to leave my first husband, never look back, and remarried a man over 8 years younger than me. So the whole cradle robbing thing does surprise everyone I knew in high school…but got some serious HIGH FIVES at my class reunions!
Jennifer-admin
I’ll bet you did get some serious high fives!! Ya’ done good my friend 😉
Daenel T
I’m sorry you had a rough start but LOL @ the high fives.
A mom to six! That’s so cool but I bet they keep you crazy busy.
I love that life often presents us with second chances.
Lorie Shewbridge
I love this post… you sound like such an interesting woman! In my case, I looked SO much like my sister (who is 4 years older than me) that people used to think we were the same person. She was super-smart, graduated valedectorian of her class & I was just an A/B student.
I also have a story similar to Eileen (execpt 2 kids, not 6) and my hubby is OLDER than me – 24 years older, not younger. =)
Just shows, you never really know what’s gonna happen to you, depending on WHO encourages you.
Daenel T
Yes, having people who truly encourage you definitely helps on so many different levels.
C Williams
Awesome article. I love to travel.
Jenn
I think I just fell in love with you – in a purely platonic way – Message From Nam (actually the only Danielle Steel novel I read) is part of why I wanted to be a writer!
I often get the same reaction when old HS friends find me on Facebook – not the “I thought you’d be in a jungle” reaction, but the “what? You’re married with kids? You’re a hosuewife? WHAT?!” reaction.
It’s fun to keep ’em guessing, isn’t it? 😉